What To Do If Your Child Is Unhappy In School*

So your child has had all the fun of leaving primary school before the big transition to secondary. Those last day of school shirts and big school trips feel like a lifetime ago. Now you’re both deep in the anxiety over the big move during summer. And sometimes that worry can be squashed after those first few days have passed. Other children form a general dislike of school that leads to unhappiness.

If your child isn’t happy at school, I’ve come up with some great coping tips for both parent and child and I want to share my takeaway from what I discovered.

Explain the Importance of Communication

If you child is unhappy at school (and you’ll know yourself by their behaviour) explain to them the importance of talking about it. Do this in a calm and reassuring manner. If your child thinks you’re going to be mad at them they won’t talk to you about it. Ask them what part of school is making them unhappy, their teacher? Their peers? The work? If you know what aspect you need to focus on together it’s easier than if they just tell you “school”.

If It’s Their Teacher

Not every child gets someone they want to bring teacher bags or gifts to at the end of the school year. Ask them how their teacher makes them unhappy ask them in what way. Often it’s a misunderstanding between pupil and teacher and it can be solved by simply talking to the teacher at a parent’s evening. Or addressing the head teacher to make them aware. In bigger schools it may be possible to move your child into a different class. Every teacher has a different teaching style and it could be your child just doesn’t cope well with how the lessons are presented. Be diplomatic but remember your child deserves to be in happy with school with a teacher who understands them.

If It’s Their Peer

If it is a bullying issue get as much information as you can and approach the school, no child should be made to feel unhappy by other children in attendance. Bullying needs to be nipped in the bud and the school needs to be aware there is an issue at school as often it can go unnoticed by the staff. Having been bullied myself as a child I know how damaging it can be and the knock of effects it can have to other aspects of school life.

If It’s The Work

Very few children are good at everything. And there are even fewer children who are good at nothing. If your child is struggling to cope with the work provided it may be worth looking at a school that offers more help in the areas they struggle in but nurtures what they’re good at. Investing in a good school such as an independent school in Surrey might be worth your time and money as they have more resources than mainstream school and your child will be treated as an individual rather than one in a large number.

Time spent in school takes up a large chunk of your son or daughter’s childhood. So you need to make sure they’re happy and thriving.